Shards of a Mirror
by GirlWhoLoved
Summary: Loki has received his punishment but all there is left of him is hate for himself. He can't take it anymore so he decides it's time to go. How will everybody react? Character Death and quite a lot of self-loathing and guilt. Post-Avengers. Rated T because maybe I'm paranoid but also because there's lots of blood.
1. Loki

**Hmm, okay this is sad again and I'm... kind of sorry. Not sorry enough to stop writing those stories though. Anyway, I got the idea while listening to "Hurt" by Christina Aguilera and well... yes. That's all I have to say actually.**

~...~

He couldn't do this anymore. He had disappointed everyone and he could not take their hateful glares or pitiful glances anymore. He had done everything wrong and he couldn't look at his face in the mirror anymore without hating everything about it. All about it was a lie, a filthy lie. His skin was blue and not pale white. His eyes were red and not green. There should be markings all over his skin. The only thing that was not a lie was his sewn shut mouth. He hadn't been able to stop the tears that had streamed down his face from the pain when it had been done. Oh, how Loki despised himself. He was so terribly weak and pathetic. He lied and betrayed, hurt and caused misery, disappointed everyone and made them angry. Such a sorry excuse for a god. A god should be kind, beautiful, considerate and without malice and hate. But he had so much hate in him he had to take it out on himself in the end. He had never been good enough, how could he be, being a monster? A monster everyone feared and nobody could ever, ever love. Angrily he punched the mirror he was standing in front of. The shards fell to the floor, clinking. His right fist was bloody now, small shards in his wounds.

It hurt and oh, it felt so good! All he deserved was pain. Agony, even. The Chitauri had had the right idea. He was a monster that deserved to be punished. He looked to the floor and groaned. He hadn't made it any better with destroying the mirror. Now his face was looking up at him, just that this time there wasn't just one of it. So many green eyes looking at him… He groaned angrily, as good as it was possible with his mouth sewn shut, and took a shard from the floor, trying to crush it in his left hand. It didn't immediately do as he wanted it to. Oh so weak, pathetic. He pressed harder, feeling the shard cutting into his flesh. It hurt, so much.

And he could just end it with letting go of the shard. No. No.

He needed this, deserved this.

He would end this tonight and nobody could stop him. He didn't want them to need into his face anymore, didn't want to have to look into their faces anymore.

Thor did everything right. The prince, the heir of the throne, the Allfather's true son.

But what did he expect? Of course a monster could not be as good as Thor. Brave Thor, who had friends and who claimed to love him. He couldn't. Why would he love him? He was not Thor's brother, he was simply a Jotun, even too weak for his own kind to live. Abandoned to die.

And why hadn't he?

Why had stupid Odin come and saved him? It would have been so much better than any of this. He would never be a worthy son, not to Odin, not to Laufey, not to anyone. Always a monster that had tried to be good and had never succeeded and that had fallen into a dark abyss instead, that had probably lost his mind.

He slumped down on the floor tiredly, letting go of the shard in his hand. There was blood all over it.

It's going to end now.

Loki smiled serenely. He wouldn't have to look at his face anymore, wouldn't have to deal with anything. Some called it the cowards' way out. But he gladly was a coward if it would only _end_.

_Oh look how desperate you are, begging for death. Pathetic creature. Monster._ He pressed his hurting hands against his temples. The voice needed to stop. It had to.

He took a stainless shard from the floor and looked at it. Mirrors used to fascinate him when he had been a little boy.

Not anymore. Angrily he cut his wrist, a long and deep and angry cut. It hurt to hold the shard in his bloody hand. It didn't matter. Quickly he took it into his other hand and did the same. From the long deep gashes blood was pouring, crimson, staining his pale white skin.

Red like Thor's cape. But he wasn't here. And he wouldn't save him, couldn't. And this time it wouldn't even be saving him, it would be torturing him even more.

And he wouldn't even be able to beg him to let him go, let him leave, let him have peace, just this one time.

No. Not that it mattered. Thor would not come.

His mouth was sewn shut and he couldn't talk. Oh, Odin knew how much he hurt him with this. He loved words, always had. He had taught reading to himself even before Thor had been taught by a teacher or sometimes even Frigga. It had been acknowledged that he could read, Frigga had even smiled and congratulated him, but that was it. And then, when Thor had been able at last to read full sentences without taking years to decipher a word, everyone had been happy. Had given him sweets for it, patted him on the back.

That had been the first night he had cried himself to sleep. Because it was just that unfair. And he hadn't been able to understand why it was so much better when Thor learnt to read than it was when he learnt to read.

Now he knew.

Because it was nicer when an Asgardian child learnt reading than a monster.

He shook his head to make these thoughts go away and concentrated on the blood. It wouldn't stop pouring out of his wounds. Destroying itself, that's what it does, Loki thought. The blood trickled down on the floor. Red against cold, white marble floor. Crimson blood against his cold, white skin. Not that much difference, was there?

He could feel how he slowly became dizzy from the blood loss. He could feel his heart beating loudly in his chest. Soon it wouldn't do that anymore.

It would be still, having killed him by pumping the blood out of his body. He wondered who would find him.

He wondered if they would grieve. Probably they wouldn't. It had to be relieving that the monster had killed itself in the end. They hadn't even had to soil their hands. He smiled mirthlessly and even smiling hurt because of the threads. So his happiness would have been punished. Not that there had been a chance that he would be happy, not with the knowledge that he was a filthy monster.

He blinked. Slowly he began to feel extremely weak. It was time. Then he couldn't even hold himself upright when sitting and he dropped backwards, backwards into the darkness he had wanted so much. It consumed him and that was when his consciousness ended.

That's how he would be found, lying on the floor, blood all over him, deep gashes in his arms, his green eyes closed. Next to him the shards of a mirror, some of them stained with crimson blood. Maybe there even would have been a serene smile on his face, but his mouth was held in place by threads.

~...~

**Please tell me what you think! And also, maybe I'll write another chapter featuring Thor. Don't know yet. If school lets me time for it.**


	2. Thor

**So, I'm back again. First of all, thank you so so so much for all the alerts and favourites! They made my day. Still do, actually. Anyway, now to the story, the rest of what I have to say can wait until the end of the chapter I guess... I hope you like this one! **

~...~

Thor hadn't seen Loki all day. It was strange since eventually Loki would come out of his room, at least once a day. But not today. In fact, Thor hadn't seen him since last night when he had gone to sleep. And now it was almost time for dinner. Well, for Thor and the other Asgardians who hadn't had their mouth sewn shut.

Thor was still angry at his father for doing that. Odin knew how terrible it was for Loki not to be able to talk. And he also knew that people would stare at him for it, stare and pity him and Thor knew Loki could stand neither staring nor pity.

So Thor decided to go to Loki's chambers. Even though Loki seemed to think he didn't care anymore, he did. A lot, actually. He knocked on his younger brother's door. "Loki? It's me, Thor. I'll… I'll come in." No sound from inside.

Thor entered the room.

And his heart stopped for a minute before it was beating faster than ever.

No. It had to be some kind of terrible nightmare, this couldn't be happening, no. He hurried over to the lifeless form of his brother, carefully avoiding the shards that were already stained with Loki's blood and the crimson spots on the floor. A strangled sob escaped him when he looked at his brother. His face was almost peaceful now, just his mouth suggested that the man in front of Thor hadn't lead a happy life, at least not as of late.

Then he saw the deep cuts in Loki's arms and something inside him clenched. He had done this to himself. He had chosen this. He had chosen this and he, his brother, had not suspected a thing and had not been able to help him. He felt so stupid.

_Oaf_.

He heard Loki saying it, so many times and now he realized how right he had been. He should have noticed. Stupid, stupid him!

Thor's tears were now running freely over his face. He dropped to his knees and pulled Loki gently into his lap. How utterly cold the other was. So he had been dead for some time now and he hadn't known. He only noticed now, maybe even hours later. He was such a stupid, stupid man. He took one of Loki's hands in his own, but was cut by something. Through his blurry vision he recognised a shard stuck in Loki's hand. Oh, what had he done? Carefully he pulled it out, as if the God of Mischief could still feel it.

But he couldn't.

And suddenly it came crashing down on him.

Loki was gone. He was dead, had killed himself, committed suicide. He had not wanted to live anymore and maybe… maybe he could have prevented this if he had paid attention. If Loki had been able to talk about things, rather than being forced to be silent. Thor sobbed. He couldn't help but feel guilty.

"Loki. Please, look, just come back. Don't leave me like this," he whispered in between his sobs. His whole body was shaking and the mighty Thor was reduced to a sobbing, shaking mess.

"Loki… we could have figured that out… Why didn't you trust me?" _Because you have always been preferred by anyone. Because you don't know what Loki has been through. Because Loki didn't trust anyone anymore. Hadn't trusted._

Eventually there weren't any tears left he could cry so Thor just sat there, staring at Loki's pale face. Then there was a thought. He wanted to see his brother's eyes one last time. Hesitatingly he reached out and gently opened Loki's eyes. The eyes were green as always. But at the same time they were so different.

He still hadn't been used to the mischievous glint in Loki's eyes being gone but now… now the life was also gone. Loki's eyes were utterly empty and it somehow scared Thor and made the whole situation even more real. Thor closed his brother's eyes again and cried again even though it still felt as if there were no tears left he could cry. Somehow there were though.

"Loki… please… wherever you are… come back, please. For me."

Thor remembered that he had always believed gods were immortal when he had been a child. But no, they weren't. Loki was dead, lifeless, gone.

Somehow he hoped this was a nightmare or at least one of Loki's tricks. He wanted to wake up or he wanted Loki to move, open his eyes again and tell him that this was all a joke, laughing. A cruel joke, but a joke nonetheless. But this Loki had been gone for a long time now. And in a way, he, Thor, had killed that happy Loki.

If he hadn't insisted on going to Jotunheim, Loki wouldn't have found out about who he was, what he was. He wouldn't have found out that his parents had been lying to him and, most importantly, Thor would have been there when Loki had needed him most.

But now it was too late. It was a mess he couldn't fix. Not anymore.

Eventually he stopped crying again and just sat there, feeling nothing. The pain had numbed him apparently. "Guards!" He cried. Only seconds later two guards came into the room, shocked to see one prince dead and one grieving. "Get the Allfather and the Queen here. Do not speak to anyone about what you have seen or you will regret it."

Nodding the two men left the room again.

Thor didn't know how much time had passed until Odin and his wife entered the room. "What-" Odin started but then he saw what had happened and why his son had needed him to come here. Frigga let out a strangled sob, covering her mouth with her hand and falling to her knees on Loki's other side.

~...~

Later that night Thor lay in his bed, not being able to sleep. He thought of the times when Loki had climbed into his bed when they had been children and when Loki had had a bad dream or when there had been a storm outside that was scaring him. Loki hadn't done so in centuries now, but now there wasn't even the _possibility_ of him doing it ever again. His sweet little brother was dead. Gone forever.

After a while he closed his eyes and he had almost fallen asleep but then he suddenly saw his brother's blank, empty eyes again in front of him and it was enough to make him jolt up. He was wide awake now and he didn't think he could ever fall asleep again. Not tonight at least. So he waited for the sun to rise again but of course it was slower than ever. Much time for him to think about Loki.

He still didn't know why. And that was the question he wanted an answer to so badly. Why did Loki think the only way out was death? Why had he even felt the need to find a way out? They could have fixed this, somehow. Thor wanted to hide in his room and never come out again. He didn't want to face any of this, he didn't want to go to Loki's funeral in three days because it made everything so real, he didn't want to tell anyone because maybe, if he didn't tell anyone, Loki would come back, somehow.

The problem was simply that even if Loki had found a way to escape death, he wouldn't want to. Why hadn't Loki at least written him a letter? Something he could hold onto, something of his brother for him to have, something that wouldn't leave him, that would remind him no matter what.

"Please, come back, Loki," Thor whispered into the darkness. But Loki wouldn't. He did what he wanted and coming back certainly wasn't one of those things. Not when he had killed himself.

~...~

**Now... what do you think? Anyway, first of all, since a few of you suggested it, I will write more than just Thor's reaction. I hope there will be something resembling a plot, but I do have ideas already so it might work. **  
**Second thing I wanted to say. Yes, I do believe that Loki could kill himself. In "Thor" when Sif and the Warriors Three came to Earth to fight together with Thor against the Destroyer, she said she would die fighting and that there would be told stories about this day. Or something along those lines anyway. It suggested that Sif could die even though she was a Goddess. So I do think Loki can die though in my interpretation it's also important that Loki wanted to do this. Argh, gosh, sorry, I'm talking way too much. **  
**I love you all, I really do! I never expected someone would like this. *explodes because of happiness***


	3. Frigga & Odin

**Hey, it's me again! Thanks again for all the alerts, favorites and of course for the lovely reviews! You are the best, seriously! I hope you like this chapter as well. **  
**Oh and I completely forgot one thing...I own nothing! Not Thor, not Loki, not Frigga, not anyone from the Marvel universe. Which is a pity but the truth.**

~...~

Odin was surprised to see the guards almost running into the throne room, their faces completely white. You didn't need to be Odin to figure out that something was very wrong.

"What is the matter, guards?" Odin demanded to know.

They bowed deeply in front of the Allfather and his wife before answering, "Prince Thor sends us. We are not to talk about what we saw, but he would like both you, Allfather, and my Queen to come to Prince Loki's chambers. It is urgent." The guard that had spoken bowed once again respectfully.

Frigga's heart beat quicker when she heard the guard's words. Something bad must have happened and she suspected it was her young one, Loki. He had not been well in the last weeks, months even but he wouldn't let her help him. He wouldn't let anyone at all help him. She felt panic rising and she got to her feet immediately, almost running out of the throne room. Right now she didn't care whether she looked graceful or not; right now she was a mother and not a queen. A worried mother at that.

Odin followed his wife. Although he was worried too, he did walk with more dignity than the queen, though you could see that his steps were longer than usual. Many people thought he was a rather cold person, especially towards his younger son after his latest crimes but he cared a lot about Loki and he had not liked having to punish his son. He did also know that at least Frigga and Thor thought the punishment was too strict, even cruel. But he would not change his mind. He knew what he was doing.

While running to her son's chambers wondering what had happened, Frigga hoped dearly that it was not the worst case, which would be finding Loki dead. She did know that Loki was a bit mentally unstable. She did know that he wasn't happy, that he suffered. But he would not let her help him. He wouldn't tell her about anything, he would tell her that he was fine, that she should not worry since he was not even her son. Every time he had said that she would tell him that he was her son no matter what but she wasn't sure if her son even listened. Maybe things would have been better if Loki hadn't been forced to write down all of his answers. She knew her son well enough to know that it probably had hurt him to be forced to so. He was the Silvertongue and not being able to speak had to be especially cruel for him.

In front of Loki's chambers Frigga stopped, taking a deep breath. She could feel her whole body shaking even though she couldn't know yet what had happened. But somehow she had a bad feeling about this and she had learnt from experience that bad feelings regarding her children were not good at all. She could hear her husband's footsteps becoming louder until they stopped behind her.

Odin stepped besides Frigga and opened the door that was slightly ajar. The complete silence was worrying him. "What-", started Odin but stopped when he saw he didn't need to ask. _What made you send the guards to get Frigga and me?_ _What happened?_

But the question was unnecessary.

Loki.

It was a sight like from an especially bad nightmare, seeing Loki's bloodied, limp body in his brother's lap.

Odin's next question would have been who had done this, but this question was also unnecessary. The shattered mirror, the deep cuts in Loki's wrists, the bloody hands were answer enough. So all Odin could do was standing there and stare at his children, one dead and one grieving. He knew he would need time to truly realise that Loki was with his daughter in Niflheim now, that he was dead. Right now he only looked for someone to blame because he needed to know that this wasn't fate. Fate couldn't be so cruel, not for a god, not for his son, not for his entire family. But the only one he could find to blame was he himself. He had been the one who had lied to Loki. True, he had only wanted to protect Loki but maybe, maybe he should have told him, maybe Loki shouldn't have found out in such a way. He had told Loki he was not good enough, even though it was not on purpose. He had punished him in a way that probably had broken him at last.

Oh, he was such a flawed man and he could not make up for it. Not anymore.

While Odin was looking for someone to blame, Frigga thought her heart would burst when she saw her son, her boy, lying there. She let out a strangled sob and covered her mouth with a trembling hand. She ran the last few steps towards Loki and fell on her knees opposite Thor, Loki in between them. Sobbing, Frigga took Loki's hand in hers. Her son's hand was covered in cuts and blood and icy cold. It was not as unnatural cold as the Jotun's whose touch would burn the skin. It was true, Loki had usually had a colder body temperature than the rest of his family, but not as cold as now.

In between two sobs she managed to get out, "Is this how you f-found him?" Did Jotuns cool down quicker than Asgardians? Neither did she know right now nor did she care.

"Yes," Thor whispered after a short pause. Then there was silence again, only punctuated with Frigga's sobs.

The Queen reached out with one hand to Loki's forehead and gently caressed it. "Oh Loki, my son, my baby, why have you done this?" It was barely audible but it didn't matter anymore. Loki wouldn't hear her, no matter how loud or quiet she was.

"I am sorry," she added after a pause. Had she failed him? Was it her fault? No… probably she shouldn't start this. How had she been supposed to know? _She was his mother. She should know._

But even looking for someone to blame didn't help her. It never had worked for her. She could not change it. Though she could try to talk to Hel, she was very sure her granddaughter would refuse to let Loki return. She loved her father and as long as she could prevent it, she would not let him return to a world where he had been unhappy enough to kill himself. And somehow Frigga could understand her.

~...~

Neither Odin nor Frigga could remember much of telling the court of Asgard about Loki's death. There was just this one sentence that would probably be stuck in their heads forever.

"Loki Odinson has passed away today."

~...~

Everything was in such a blur. Frigga remembered talking to her husband about whether or not to talk to Hel. She would probably be furious because of her father's death. Even though he was with her then, she would hate it. She would hate the fact that someone had hurt him enough to make him do this. And a furious Hel was not pleasant.

Odin and Frigga also talked about letting the Avengers know. They were Thor's friends and even though they were neither Asgardian nor exactly friends of Loki's, they decided that they would be allowed to attend the funeral if they wanted to and if only for Thor's sake. Also, they had a right to know that the god that had attempted to destroy their realm was dead now, however painful it was for his family.

~...~

It was Frigga herself who removed the threads on Loki's mouth. She would not let anyone else do it.

"I am his mother, it is my duty."

~...~

**What do you think? I really hope you liked it, I'm not entirely content with this chapter, but I can't tell what it is so I'll just leave it like this. For now at least. Ah gosh, I'm nervous about what you'll say about this. I worry too much. Till next chapter then, my lovely readers! **


	4. Sif

**Hello there, time for a new chapter! This one is about Sif, but don't worry, there might be something about Loki and something about the Avengers soon. Anyway, thanks again for the lovely reviews, the favorites and the follows, you're all great! Now I won't bore you any longer, let's go! **

~...~

Sif was shocked to hear about Loki's death. It was true, they had never been the best friends, not after he had cut off her beautiful golden hair. But in some strange way, she had still liked him. Maybe it simply was because of Thor. Loki had always meant a lot to Thor and the God of Mischief had even made his brother laugh. And Sif definitely liked seeing Thor happy. And now…

Thor stood on a balcony overlooking Asgard. His eyes were red and puffy. They had been ever since he had found Loki. There were also big bags under the god's eyes from the lack of sleep. To be honest, Thor looked like hell, but who could blame him? She didn't have siblings, but losing one of them, adopted or not, had to be tough.

Slowly she walked up to Thor, putting a hand gently on his back. Of course the God of Thunder jumped. He had probably been lost in thought so he hadn't heard her coming.

"Oh, it is you," he said quietly, his voice raspy.

"Indeed. I thought you could use somebody to talk to or just to be here with you. If you do not wish for my presence, I can also go away again, it is not a problem." She smiled at him sadly.

For a split second there was also a smile on Thor's face, but then it vanished and he looked at the city beneath him again.

Since he hadn't said anything about her being supposed to leave, she stayed with him, though she didn't know what to say. What could she possibly say to make this better? She couldn't think of anything. It was always like that, every time someone needed comfort, she couldn't think of anything that could possibly make it better. So they spent several minutes in silence.

"He thought he was a monster." Thor's voice was quieter than she had ever heard it.

"Excuse me?" Sif asked, not being sure she had heard correctly.

"Last night… I… I could not sleep, so I went into his room. On his desk was a book I had never seen before. When I touched it, I had this strange sensation just like those you had when you walked through one of his illusions. I… I think it was protected through magic but it… it… stopped working when h-he died." Tears were streaming down Thor's face and he couldn't speak. Gently she put her small hand over his much bigger one and squeezed it lightly.

It had to be very painful when something as final as magic dying happened. She had had read about it in books when she had been a child, about sorcerers and sorceresses whose magic faded after their death. Now that the same happened with Loki's magic it had to become more… real for Thor.

"What was in the book?" Sif asked softly when he had calmed down a bit.

"It… it was a diary. Maybe it was not right of me to read it but… I wanted reasons… Reasons why L-Loki… did this. The last entry… it was from the day before this… happened. I… he wrote he was a… a m-monster who… deserved pain and… severe p-punishment… he wrote he was u-unworthy of a god and weak. And o-over and over again he w-wrote he was a m-monster, a liar." Thor was shaking with sobs by now.

Sif gently turned him towards her and hugged him. While she was trying to comfort him she wondered if Loki had known how much he had meant to Thor. What he had done to him by doing this. She had never known or even suspected that Loki of all people would hate himself so much. He had been so proud, so sure of himself or so it had always seemed.

But then again… maybe nobody had looked closely enough. Loki had been jealous. Nobody who was content with him- or herself would be jealous, simply because they were exactly like they wanted to be. Had Loki thought Thor would be king because he himself simply wasn't good enough? It was possible. She had noticed Frigga and especially Odin seemed to be much prouder of Thor when he had done something good than of Loki. What if Loki had tried over and over again to be as good as Thor and had failed, at least from his point of view? Was this the reason he had let go of the staff after the happenings on the Bifrost?

Sif thought it was unfair that Thor had to go through pain of losing Loki twice. The first time Thor had been sad but not as devastated as this time. Maybe it was because this time there was actually a dead body, something that was proof of Loki's death. And then of course Loki's magic had not faded the first time, so they had had still hope that the God of Mischief had survived the fall from the Bifrost. But this time… This time there was no hope.

"I'm sorry… So sorry," she mumbled.

"I-if I had only known… Sif, maybe I c-could have prevented it. I… I failed him."

"No… No, Thor, do not do this to you, don't. Loki has always done what he wanted and he has never talked much. You could not have known."

"But… I was his brother… I knew him better than anyone and…"

"But when even you did not notice, Thor… Maybe Loki did not _want_ you to notice. You know how he is…" Sif stopped herself from correcting her sentence to _'You know how he was.'_ Thor knew all too well Loki was dead; he didn't need her to remind him again.

After a few more minutes Thor pulled back and wiped away his tears. "Thank you for your kindness, Sif. But now I have to discuss my visit on Midgard with my parents. Our Midgardian friends have a right to know about this."

She nodded. "Of course. And you are very welcome, Thor."

With that he walked away and left Sif to her thoughts. She didn't feel anything or at least she didn't know what she was feeling and that made her feel guilty. Everything in her was numb. Of course she felt sorry for Thor's loss and that of Odin and Frigga. But she herself… she had not been close to Loki and of course she thought it was terrible that he had committed suicide, but… that did not made her feel anything. And she had to feel something, hadn't she? She hoped that the emotions would come when she had realised this completely.

Quietly Sif groaned. It was so confusing and sad and all in all a twirl of emotions.

"Loki, do you know what you are doing to Thor? Why can't you come back and if only for his sake?" She whispered.

~...~

**Now, as always I'd very much appreciate to know what you think! It helps me a lot. If you have any suggestions, you're also very welcome to tell me about them. Um, I don't really know what else to say but thank you for reading this! I love you all, really, I do.** **You all get virtual cake/ cookies/ chocolate /(insert what you'd like to eat) from me!**


	5. Hel & Loki

**Phew, here's the next chapter! I'm sorry it's a bit late, but we had guests all day yesterday and I didn't have the chance to complete the chapter and upload it, sorry! I hope you like it, it's been rather difficult to write. Also, you'll see that my version of Hel is more based on Norse mythology than on the version of her in the Marvel comics. I hope this isn't a problem. Thanks again for the reviews and follows and favorites! They mean a lot to me! Anyway, I don't own any of these characters, sadly.**

~...~

Slowly Loki regained consciousness, much to his dislike though. While slowly waking he wished nothing more than to get back into the comfortable darkness, nothingness, that had surrounded him until then. He had ended his life so he would not have to feel anything anymore, to end it. And now… he was waking. He hoped nobody had saved him. He hoped he was at least in Niflheim, with his daughter. She wouldn't be pleased, he knew that. His best tip was that she would first of all scold him, then she would proceed to curse everyone who had hurt him, who had made him do this. He had to smile a bit.

Oh.

Something was different. What was it?

He opened his eyes and found himself in a dark room. Where was he? He let his eyes wander and then he saw a woman beside his bed. He smiled again (something was still different… What could it be, by the nine realms? His mind was still too fuzzy). She had long black hair and one part of her face was currently resting on the bed. She was asleep. Loki knew that if she would lift her head, the hidden part of her face would look like a skeleton. But Loki didn't care, he loved her anyway.

It was Hel, his daughter, who was banished to Niflheim to rule over Helheim. Loki saw her very rarely, a fact that he didn't like at all.

He wanted to move his hand but there was a soft resistance… he looked down. Hel was holding his hand and he smiled again.

Oh.

Realisation hit him. It was his mouth. It didn't hurt to move it anymore. Slowly he touched it with his free hand. The threads were gone, he could talk again! But most of all, it didn't hurt anymore. So much better…

He wondered if they had already found his body back in Asgard. He wondered if they grieved. Or would they be happy to be rid of him? He sighed. He didn't have an answer to any of those questions and thinking about it wouldn't make it any better.

He reached out with his free hand and slowly touched Hel's cheek. It was strangely cold, but after all he was a Jotun so he wasn't really one to talk. Hel's eye fluttered open and immediately she sat up straight. When she noticed her father was awake, she glared at him with green eyes the same colour as her father's.

"You should not be here, father," she hissed.

"Are you not happy to see me, Hel? Because I am happy to see you." He smiled, hoping this would calm her down.

It didn't.

The girl got up and started pacing through the room, hands behind her back. Then she stopped abruptly. "What were you thinking? You just… Why did you do this?" Hel didn't understand what had made her father do this, she really didn't. She had known her father was in trouble, of course she had heard about what he had done in Asgard and in Midgard and she knew the Allfather well enough to know that he couldn't be pleased by this. And she knew from her own experience that he was not too gentle when he wasn't pleased. But… suicide? Expectantly she looked at him, waiting for an answer. And here he would answer, even though he was her father, she was the queen of this realm.

Loki sighed. Hel would not take some excuses for an answer. Were there excuses for committing suicide? He shook his head lightly and said, "I am sorry, Hel. I really am, I did not wish to worry you. I could not go on like this. The Allfather had my mouth sewn shut and apart from the fact that it hurt it was humiliating and everyone stared at me for it. I hated it with a passion." He paused, trying to find the right words. "I… I could not, and still cannot, see me as anything but a monster and I could not bear it any longer. I was tired of being the second best, the faithless Prince, the Jotun. So I took the only way out I could see. I can only repeat that I did not mean to hurt you." During his speech he had sat up, too. Seconds after he had stopped talking Hel sat on his lap and pulled him into an embrace. Then she cried into his shoulder. She couldn't stand seeing her father like this, couldn't stand hearing from her father's mouth that he was a monster. But she knew the feeling all too well.

Loki smiled sadly and held his daughter while rubbing soothing circles on her back. "It will be fine, Hel, you'll see. We can spend time together now. More time than in the past." _And maybe I will be happier here than in Asgard._

Hel pulled back a bit and smiled at him sadly. Then she answered quietly, "That would be nice. But… are you sure you want to stay here? Niflheim and also Helheim are not very pleasant realms; it's mostly dark and cold here. You… you could go back. I would let you."

He shook his head smiling just as sadly as his daughter and pressed a kiss to her forehead before answering, "Hel, look. I wanted to get out of Asgard because I never meant anything to any of them there. To be honest I… I wanted it all to end. I did not want to have to think anymore. This did not quite work out as I wanted it, but I can live with that here. I need time to… heal."

Hel hugged her father again, silently. She assumed he knew that she felt the same way sometimes.

After a while Hel pulled back again. "They want you back."

Loki frowned. What did she mean? Who wanted him back? He had a suspicion but no, it couldn't be.

"Odin sent word and asked me to send you back. He said they were grieving, most of all Thor. He wrote that Thor is not himself anymore, not since you are gone. He misses you, he is… devastated." Hel looked on the floor while Loki stared wide-eyed at nothing in particular.

"No. That cannot be true. This is merely a trick to get me back to Asgard so he can proceed in punishing me. I do not mean anything to Thor. Only his idea of us being brothers in everything but blood, his idea of him bringing me onto the right path again, his idea of making me a _good_ person means something to him." Loki's words sounded hollow, they didn't hold any emotions.

"No, that is not true. I am sure he loves _you_ and not an idea of how you should be." But truth was that she barely knew her uncle but from what she had heard from people other than Loki, he couldn't be that bad. And a few years ago Loki had liked him a lot, even though he often said he also was an oaf.

"I wish you were right," Loki said quietly.

None of them said anything until Hel broke the silence again. "I will send word back that we are not sure yet if you will return but that we are sure that you will require time. Is that alright?"

Loki nodded.

~...~

Later Hel stood in front of a mirror. Her father had fallen asleep again but she couldn't sleep. She knew what it felt like to think you were a monster. Half of her face was only a skeleton. Her father had never been bothered by this, he had told her over and over again that she was beautiful the way she was. But the other children in Asgard had avoided her. They were scared of her. Even some of the adults back there had been scared or at least disgusted by her appearance. This went on until her grandfather himself had banished her to Niflheim were she was to rule over one part of the dead.

This had of course not done anything to boost her self-confidence. Over time she had learnt to hide the "scary" part of her face, as she sometimes called it. This had made her feel better about herself. But she still knew that it was there. Apart from that, much energy was required to hold up the illusion so she couldn't do it all the time.

~...~

**So... I hope you all liked it! **

**To jaquelinelittle: First of all, of course you get your gingerbread and your mulled wine. Then, thank you for reviewing! What you said about Sif was really interesting. I could also imagine that but I think she needs some time to process everything because frost giant or not, it's still a shock.** **Thank you though!**


	6. The Avengers

**So, it's me once again. With a new chapter. Which will hopefully please you. Ugh, seriously, this was difficult to write somehow and I really, really hope you'll like it. Aaah, nervousness. Okay, sorry, I'll stop with freaking out. Oh and pretty much the whole chapter was written while I listened to "Broken Crown" and "Below my feet", both by Mumford & Sons so... well, I guess they would fit pretty well when reading the chapter. Gosh, I'm rambling again. So, thanks again for the favorites and follows and reviews and as always, I sadly don't own anything. Apart from a well developed fantasy when it comes to depressing things. So, once again, I hope you'll like it aaaaand here you go!**

~...~

"So what happened, big guy? Frankly, you… don't look good," Tony asked when Thor was sitting in Stark Tower's living room at last.

About ten minutes ago JARVIS had informed them about Thor on the roof and the Avengers, that had for once been assembled, had quickly gotten up to the roof, despite the raging storm outside. It hadn't stopped raining for a few days now and when they saw Thor, who honestly looked like crap, it dawned to them that the God of Thunder was probably at least one part of the reason for the endless rain. Natasha had asked why he was here, to which she got the answer, "I have to make an announcement." They had looked at each other in surprise. What could Thor possibly have to tell them? Was Loki on the loose again? Bruce asked Thor to come in because none of them really wanted to stay in the pouring rain. Thor simply nodded at the invitation and followed the Avengers into the Tower, strangely quiet and somehow… sad? Could that be? None of them was sure.

And that was where they were now.

Thor was restlessly pacing through the room, making Natasha, Clint, Tony, Bruce and Steve even more nervous. That was when Tony asked Thor what had happened.

Thor stopped his pacing and looked at them properly for the first time. His eyes were bloodshot and they were big bags underneath them.

Something was very wrong then.

Thor cleared his throat, but his voice was raspy nonetheless. "My brother, Loki… he took his own life." And Thor's voice broke again, and he was fighting back his tears. He couldn't cry here, not in front of his team mates, in front of the fellow warriors.

The other Avengers stared at Thor dumbfounded. How were they supposed to feel? Thor had obviously been mourning for his brother ever since he had found out about this… tragedy. It was a tragedy, even though Loki had been their enemy.

Steve wordlessly got up and hugged Thor. He could need it now. Steve hadn't exactly been a fan of Loki but he was Thor's friend and he knew the god had loved his brother, no matter if his mind was a box of cats or not. He had never got to know the Loki from Thor's stories, the happy god that loved tricks and magic more than anything. The Loki that had loved his brother. They knew of Loki's heritage by now, Thor had told them, and they also knew what it had done to Loki. Nobody knew what exactly he had been doing between the fall off the Bifrost and his appearance on Earth.

"I'm sorry," Steve said quietly. Then he pulled back and saw that the god was on the verge of tears.

Natasha spoke up. "You can cry, you know. Nobody in here will judge you." She gave Clint a look that told him to be nice even though he had not been overly fond of Loki after all that had happened. He seemed to understand or so she hoped. Natasha had never been good with emotions so she didn't know how to feel… Maybe she needed to hear the whole story before she could say anything about it.

Bruce seemed to have the same idea because he said, "If you would not mind too much, Thor, could you tell us what happened? Because for us he is still, you know, the man who wanted to take over the world and not the one who was… and not someone who would commit suicide." _'Who was desperate enough to commit suicide,'_ was probably not the best way to phrase it.

Thor sighed and answered, his voice still unsteady, "When we came back to Asgard, Loki had his trial. Odin decided having Loki's mouth sewn shut was a fit punishment for his sins so that was done." Every single Avenger gasped. Odin had _sewn shut_ Loki's mouth. That was just… sick. No speaking, no eating and surely having everyone staring at you.

"_What_ was done?" Tony asked weakly.

"His mouth… it was sewn shut." He shook his head tiredly. "Both my mother and I thought the punishment was too strict, cruel, but we could not convince Odin of it. I should have not given up. Maybe Loki would still be alive if I had not failed to convince our father."

Silence.

Then, "No." It was Bruce. "Don't do this to you, Thor, you couldn't have known. This was Loki's decision and I don't think anything could have changed it."

"But… I… I know I should not have done so, but… his diary… he wrote he was a monster. Over and over again. Maybe if he could have just talked to anyone…" Tears were silently streaming down the Thunderer's face.

The team was silent. It was the very same thing they themselves had said about Loki, wasn't it? Natasha had even _told_ him he was a monster.

_Monster._

He had killed 80 human beings in two days.

_Monster._

He had mind-controlled Clint and had threatened to make him kill Natasha in every way he knew she feared.

_Monster. _

"You pretend to be separate, to have your own code, something that makes up for the horrors. But they are a part of you, and they will never go away!"

What had he meant?

_Monster._

He had thrown Tony out of the window, surely intending to kill him.

_Monster. _

Over and over again, that's what they had called him when talking about him privately, when thinking about him.  
_Monster._

And that was what Loki had thought, too.

And they couldn't help but feel guilty.

There was a long silence until Clint asked one word.

"How?" It was quiet and spoken cautiously. It probably was still difficult for Thor to talk about it.

Everyone looked up. All of them wanted to know but maybe… maybe they didn't want at the same time.

At first they thought Thor would not answer, simply because Thor didn't show any sign of having so much as _heard_ the question. But then he said, "There was a mirror in his room. He… we think he hit it with his bare fist so it shattered." He gulped. "It looks as if… he tried to crunch a shard in his hand… It was so…" Thor's voice broke again and he needed a few moments to compose himself again. "He slit his wrists… well, almost his entire forearm… on… on b-both sides."

Thor let his face sink into his hands and his shaking shoulders made it clear that the god was crying.

Bruce felt sorry for Loki. He had been thinking of himself as a monster for quite some time in the past, he even did now at times. He had also tried to commit suicide, but the other guy hadn't let that happen. He knew what it felt like to be so hopeless that the only way out seemed to be dying, he knew how much you needed to hate yourself.

And nobody deserved it.

"When I found him he… he was c-cold. He had been… d-dead for a while then. And… there w-was… there was b-blood, s-so m-much blood." The memory of it made Thor shudder. It had looked so much like a nightmare and he knew this image would haunt his dreams for a long time. Maybe forever. How was he supposed to know?

Loki had been so alone when he had died. So alone.

Natasha got up and hugged Thor like Steve had. "I'm sorry, Thor."

Then she let go and Clint did the same, followed by Tony, Bruce and Steve again. All of them mumbled an "I'm sorry."

And they meant it.

After the embraces they sat in a rather uncomfortable silence. Thor cried silently, he simply couldn't stop his tears.

How long would it be like this? Would he always cry when he thought of Loki?

Or would Loki… come back?

Odin had asked Hel to send Loki back but the answer had not been there yet, when he had gone to Midgard. There was hope.

But would Loki _want_ to return? He knew that Hel loved her father and if he didn't want to return… she wouldn't force him.

Thor wiped away his tears and fought back more of them that threatened to fall from his eyes.

"My friends, I have also come here to… ask you whether you want to attend my brother's… my brother's f-funeral or not. I could understand you very well if you did not want to and I would not be upset about it."

Each of them thought for a moment or two.

Steve was the first one to speak. "I would like to attend it, Thor."

Thor nodded.

Bruce was the next to agree to come to the funeral.

After that came Tony and Natasha.

Clint took the longest to agree but he had his reasons after all. In the end though he promised to attend to funeral as well.

"Thank you my friends," Thor said, smiling at them sadly. "I will go now but return tomorrow morning to take you to Asgard with me."

And with that he walked out of the room before any of them could say anything. They decided that Thor probably didn't want anyone to follow him, otherwise he would not have disappeared this quickly.

After another few minutes spent in silence that was only disturbed by the sound of raindrops against the windows Tony wordlessly got up and walked over to his bar where he poured himself a drink. He needed this now, really, he did. His treacherous emotions were a mess. He felt sorry for Thor. He felt also a bit sorry for Loki, only a small bit, because… well, he didn't know why exactly. But being desperate enough to kill yourself… You really had to be a mess. And having a father who thought it was a good punishment to sew your lips shut… That was really crap. Tony was also utterly disgusted by the "punishment". It was more torture than justice. No matter if Loki was a god or not, a stitched up mouth had to hurt like hell. Tony took a sip from his Scotch and hoped it would make it better.

Bruce… well, he would have never thought that the god was so insecure. He had always thought gods were proud and sure of themselves, generous. And Loki was none of that above.

Maybe this was the problem. Maybe Loki had felt he was not enough. Thor was the absolute opposite of Loki and Thor was the heir to the throne. Maybe Loki had felt he was not enough? Bruce sighed. He didn't know. How could he know what was going on in a deity's mind? Perhaps he should just go on feeling sorry for the god, perhaps that was all he could do.

Eventually Natasha got up and said quietly, "I need exercise." And with that she left the room, no doubt heading to one of the training rooms. Shortly after her departure Clint got up and followed her, Steve did the same. Maybe it would help to clear their minds.

~...~

**So this was it for today. What do you think?**


	7. The Funeral

**First of all: I'm so so so so incredibly sorry for updating so late. The combination of birthday parties, Christmas and a small writer's block didn't increase my productivity. I'm sorry. Thank you for the favorites, follows and reviews! They mean a lot to me! So anyway, further notes will be below. Oh and by the way, I'm not entirely content with this chapter but I hope you like it anyway.**

~...~

The Avengers had imagined Asgard to be… different. Yes, it was mostly shiny with gold and magnificent and stunning and every other adjective with a similar meaning, but it was… sad. And they guessed they might just know why. It was very quiet, much quieter than they had ever imagined such a huge place like this could be. People wore black clothes, even Thor's cape was black as night and it looked… strange, unfamiliar. They hadn't been sure what to wear to an Asgardian funeral so they had decided to go dressed in black, hoping it would be the right thing to do and apparently it was. Everywhere they went people whispered and Steve thought he caught Loki's name one time. He wondered if those people had liked the second prince of Asgard or if they were disgusted by what he had done. Were they shocked? Did they really mourn? Or did they just put on the black clothes and behave as it was expected from the king?

Thor led them into the throne room. In the centre was an open coffin with someone in it and it was clear that it was Loki. Thor shut his eyes for a moment and gulped when he saw the coffin. A woman stood next to the coffin, holding Loki's white hand. Her shoulders were shaking lightly and it was clear that she was crying. The Avengers looked to the ground.

So much pain.

Thor looked at his mother, at his father's weary face, considered his own state… and wondered how Loki could have ever assumed that he was an unloved monster.

Of course there were whispers in Asgard, whispers that the young prince had been a frost giant, a real monster, an enemy. His actions on Asgard and on Midgard seemed to prove it. Thor swore that if he ever heard someone saying that, he would kill him or her instantly. His brother was no monster. He had chosen the wrong path, had hurt people and had been hurt but everything because he wanted acceptance. Thor would never doubt that.

Odin was still looking for a scapegoat or not so much anymore since Frigga had lost it.

Odin had been pacing in their room, incessantly trying to find someone, _anyone_, who had failed and caused Loki's death. Suddenly he stopped walking.

"The guards should have heard something! And if I am not mistaken, a maid was supposed to-"

"Stop this, Odin!" Frigga had shouted and got to her feet. "Stop it! There is nobody at fault because Loki _chose_ to die! Do you hear? He wanted to die, he did it himself and no guard and no maid could have stopped him!" Tears were streaming down her face and she was trembling. "Don't you understand? He will not come back unless he _wants_ to and I doubt he does!" She was sobbing by now, sitting down on her bed again and hiding her face in her hands. "He will not come back," she mumbled. Then she looked up at her husband again. "And even if he had suddenly been afraid, had not wanted this anymore… he could not call for help. He… would have been completely and utterly helpless." Odin gulped.

Then he saw down next to his wife and pulled her in his arms. "I am sorry." And it wasn't enough but it was all he could say.

But now it was the day of Loki's funeral and he had to greet their Midgardian guests. So he got up from his throne and walked down to them.

"Welcome to Asgard! I am deeply sorry that we have to meet under such grave circumstances, but it is a pleasure nonetheless. I am Odin Allfather and my wife Frigga stands over there with her son."

They all bowed their heads a bit, not sure how to act around the king of the gods.

"On behalf of my entire team I want to express my sincerest condolences. We are deeply sorry for what happened," Steve said. He was the leader of the team after all, and everyone who hadn't been content with that in the past, was relieved now that it was that way. The god was slightly intimidating and they didn't know what to say anyway.

Odin nodded. "It is not your fault but I thank you."

"You are welcome," Steve said.

Odin sighed and then said, "I believe it is time." With that he walked over to his dead son, where Frigga already stood. Thor joined his parents and also the Avengers came closer.

It was strange seeing their former enemy lying there, calm, almost peaceful. But they knew better. Even though long sleeves hid the gashes on his arms, every single person in the room knew they were there.

Loki was pale, literally deathly pale. But that wasn't a surprise. Tony looked at the god more closely. When he spotted the red dots around Loki's mouth he couldn't help but feel sick. Thor hadn't lied, it hadn't been a metaphor. Tony looked away, looked at Steve, who seemed to be a bit sick as well.

Then Odin spoke. "Loki Odinson, my son, take your daggers with you. I hope you will not need them where you are, but one can never be sure." None of the Avengers had noticed that Odin was holding two daggers in his hands that he now put into the coffin.

Next was Frigga. She smiled sadly and tears were streaming down her face again. She had a small book in her hands. "Loki, my little boy, I still do not want you to leave." She put a hand on his cold forehead and brushed a dark streak out of his face.

This was the moment Natasha truly realised that Loki was loved by his family and that he would be missed, that he probably really had been different at some point in the past, that things had happened to make him the way he had been when they had met him. She couldn't quite describe the feeling or what exactly her realisations included apart from that but it made her so indescribably sad. But she was Natasha Romanoff, the Black Widow. She wouldn't cry at Loki's funeral.

"My son, I want you to take this with you. I know it is probably not as helpful as your daggers, but I want you to have it. It is… it is a storybook. I used to read it to you and it always was your favourite." She put the book into his coffin, her hand trembling. Then she took a step back and took her husband's hand. She needed something to hold onto. It broke her heart to see her son like this, it wasn't supposed to be. She was his mother, she should die before he did. And now here she was, putting the storybook he had loved so dearly as a little boy, in his coffin.

Thor was the third and last to step to Loki's coffin. "Brother, I… I hope you will come back. I am sorry, so sorry if I failed you. I never meant to do so. I have your spell book for you. I know it is the first one you ever got and I thought… maybe you would need it where you are now. I do not know, I have never been there. I hope you and Hel are well." Thor's voice was raspy and broke every now and then while speaking and it was terrible. Nobody of his team had ever seen him like this, so sad, so broken. Thor wordlessly put the book into the coffin and squeezed Loki's hand for a moment. Then he stepped back.

Odin gestured someone to come here and three men and a woman they had overlooked when they had entered the room walked towards them, carrying the coffin lid.

~...~

The funeral was smaller than they had expected. It was very private and Bruce almost felt like an intruder. Thor and three men that called themselves the Warriors Three carried the coffin, the Avengers, a woman called Sif, Frigga and Odin following them.

Thor frowned. The sun was shining as if nothing had happened. It looked so happy and just like any other day and he felt as if it should rain and rain and never stop to do so until Loki returned. _If_ Loki returned.

At last they reached the graveyard near the forest where Loki would be buried. Thor, Volstagg, Fandral and Hogun put down the coffin next to hole that had already been dug. Then they took the ropes that had already been put out and a few minutes later the coffin was in the hole.

There was silence and nobody said anything. The singing birds and the wind in the trees were the only noises that could be heard.

Clint still wasn't entirely sure if Loki wouldn't just jump out of the coffin, cackling, and tell them that it had all been a joke, a trick, and nothing more. But by now he would have done so, wouldn't he? He would have never let Thor read his diary and he wouldn't have faked it, not with such content. He wouldn't _choose_ to look weak. Clint knew that much. But it was so hard to grasp that the arrogant and proud man from a few months back had been so desperate to kill himself.

"We are here today to say goodbye to my son, Loki. When I found him, he was a helpless baby, scared and hungry. He had been left to die by his biological parents but I took him with me, hoping he could bring peace to our realms someday. Frigga and I never told him about his true heritage, we believed it was best for him to think he was our real son, which he was. He was our real son, just as much as Thor is. We love… loved him as much as we loved Thor but apparently we have failed him in some situations. For that, I am truly sorry. When he found out about his true heritage I failed to convey our love to him. He believed himself to be a stolen relic. It started a series of unfortunate events that ended in his… s-suicide." Odin closed his eye and took a deep breath. Then he opened it again. "That is all I have to say."

It wasn't. There was so much he wanted to say, but he wanted to do that in private. He wanted to tell Loki that he was so sorry, that he had been too strict, that he now knew that Loki would have needed something else entirely, not such a severe punishment, but… trust, acceptance, love. One of those things. And again and again he wanted to tell him he was sorry. So sorry.

A few minutes of silence followed. Nobody knew what to say. Thor and Frigga were crying silently and even Sif wiped away a tear. She and the Warriors Three were some of the few Asgardians that that weren't disgusted by Loki's true heritage. Of course it had come to light eventually and people whispered, explained why Loki was different, a monster, because of his true parents, told others that they had never trusted the younger prince.

Hogun had been sceptical at first, it was too easy to think what everyone else thought, so tantalizingly easy. Sif, Volstagg and Fandral… they couldn't explain why they felt the way they did but maybe it was because of Thor. Because someone couldn't be that bad when your best friend is so devastated about that person's death, right?

To everyone's surprise it was Tony who broke the silence. "Um, if that's okay, I'd like to say something." Frigga nodded.

"You see, Loki and us Avengers… we weren't exactly on best terms, probably because he tried to take over our world. Anyway, that's not what I wanted to talk about. But you see, none of us wanted to end it like that. From what Thor told us, I know that Loki's been different. And there were times when I briefly saw how he was back then and… well, I'd have liked to see more of that. Maybe we could have been something like friends someday. Anyway, I'm sorry that I'll probably never get to know him properly. I'm also sorry for Thor because I know he blames himself and he really shouldn't. And I'm sorry for, um, you, Odin and Frigga, because you lost your son. And parents try to blame themselves when something like this happens to their children most of the time and I wanted to say, please, don't. That's all I have to say, really." Tony guessed he shouldn't bring up Loki's cruel punishment just now. Maybe later, but not now, not when he was being buried.

Thor stepped forward. "I do not have much to say. I only want to apologise for not being there for Loki when he needed me and I want to say that I love my brother."

After another few minutes of silence a servant appeared with a shovel that he gave to Odin with a bow. Then the young man went away again.

Odin let a shovelful of earth drop onto the coffin.

~...~

**To the guest who suggested the two songs: thank you! They are brilliant. **

**Then I want to say that I am not entirely sure if the critic about the sentence that Loki has killed 80 people in two days was meant for me or for the makers of the Avengers because it's a quote from the movie. Anyway, I mostly agree with what you said.**

**Now I want to thank you all for reading! I love you, you're the best! As you maybe have already guessed, this is the end of the story. For now at least. I don't know what my brain will come up with in the future. So anyway, bye! It was lovely!  
**

* * *

**Note: I wanted to say that should I decide to let Loki return, he would not have to get out of his coffin and live in his old body like a zombie. Since he has a body in Niflheim, at least of some sort, I would work with this. This is just an idea that is not ready for anything yet though, I'm not even sure if I'll use it. That's all. **


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